Week In Review

Oh, “the list”. If you are an adoptive parent, you may be able to relate to the obsessive quality it takes on in your life. Our wonderful adoption agency puts up monthly stats for AAI families to see regarding referrals, court dates, and the list of requests from waiting families. They are awesome about relaying facts only, and not getting swept away in speculation. We are also known to read any Ethiopian adoption blog we can find, especially families with AAI.

I experienced a major roller coaster of emotions last week, when a friend’s (I have actually never met her, but anyone on this journey is considered as much in my mind) blog stated that 3 referrals had been given. Needless to say I let my imagination run wild, thinking we were now number five. My heart soared as I thought about how soon it could be. My level-headed husband merely kissed me good night and said he wasn’t getting his hopes up until we heard from AAI. We did find out the next day that we indeed had moved up (yay!), but 2 of the 3 referrals were for families “behind” us on the list. Many of the families ahead of us on the list desire girls, or two kids, and these families behind us received infant boys. If families intend on adopting 2 kids, the Ethiopian government states that they must be 9 months apart, unless twins, and these little guys were not. My brain could process the reasons why those boys were not intended for us, and I knew that God had placed those babes for a reason, but my heart was broken. I was truly surprised by the intensity of my emotions, which of course, only made me more emotional. I found it hard to rejoice that 2 orphans were receiving families, when I wanted so badly for them to call our house home.

The next day I picked up a book by Jeff Manion called “The Land Between: Finding God in Difficult Transitions”. I had wanted to read this book for almost a year, but I believe God was waiting to place it into my hands until now. It’s a great book that spoke to me about calling out to God in honest ways during difficult situations. I really felt like God was soothing me through the words of the author and reassuring me that He continues to work out all things for good. I really need to be keeping a better prayer journal, because I have been truly amazed to see God’s hand time and time again in our adoption. He was able to get my heart and brain back on the same page.

We are now officially number 6 on the list, because along with the 3 referrals last week, one also happened yesterday. We are thankful for referrals, babies getting families, and God’s help in the easy and the hard.